Tag Archives: hope

Three for Thursdays! 09.08.11

It’s Three for Thursday time! I missed last Thursday because I was so nervous about by epidural! So I thought I would highlight the happy since that procedure.

#1 – I spent the day after the procedure knitting – SITTING and knitting – for hours! Not only was I sitting upright without massive, constant pain but I could actually concentrate on knitting, it was wonderful! I am actually optimistic enough to sign up for a knitting class at the end of the month.

#2 – Out of 3 work days, I have had 2 very good, low pain days at the office. The is just amazing to me! I am hoping for this to be a continual trend.

#3 – Since the epidural, I have not once had watery eyes due to pain. Instead, I have had several occasions of leaky eyes due to realizing that I am NOT in agonizing pain.

I am happy, thankful and most importantly – hopeful. So happy to have some hope for a change… I am just about ready to kick up my heals, just about…

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Cautiously Optimistic

Caudal Epidural +3

I remain cautiously optimistic. I am trying to not get ahead of myself. These first few days have been a dream. I did not think it possible for me to do the things I have done the last two days.

I know that I will have to have more laparoscopies remove any new lesions and such – but the relief is amazing! I know that this relief may not last… But I will take what I can get! I keep crying at the oddest times because I will realize I am not fighting pain. I am going out and doing!

I haven’t been jumping out of planes or diving with great whites. I have been doing things I loved to do in the past before my endometriosis became debilitating. While they may be things you would think I could do while I “rest” from the pain, but what most don’t realize is that pain does not allow you to concentrate. The pain becomes too distracting to do anything you actively have to pay attention to.

I have watched movies, I have been knitting, I have been sitting for hours, I have been walking through large stores, I have drunk beer made from a 130 thousand year old glacier, I have stood during a speech, I have mad dinner (Chicken Pad Thai) – I have been alive!

All without excruciating pain.

If my future holds more needles in my spine, having my bare fanny hanging out for all to see and butt crack band aids – bring it on! I will take anything to help me fight! I may not have a crystal ball but my future finally seems hopeful!

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Up, Waiting and Hopeful

So, it seems I spend a lot of my time waiting for my meds to kick in to help elevate some of the pain. This morning I was up about an hour before my first dose of the day. It is almost like the pain from the endometriosis wants to make sure I am awake and feeling the pain before I can fight back.

It’s been at least a couple months since I have had some hope about being pain free or at least pain less. I was really hoping that Lyrica was going to be the answer, but it is only half of it. I am happy it has gotten rid of the majority of lightning nerve pain that shoots down my leg. Unfortunately, it has not anything for my original pain.

I am so excited to go to my first pain management appointment tomorrow morning to talk about nerve blocks. It is something I have hope in. It is hard to think I have to live with such pain and I am ready for something new.

I am ready for something to give me hope.

I am ready to do some more fighting!

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