Below is my (edited) inflammatory post from last week. It was only meant to describe how I felt about having to leave my job and what I saw as possibilities. It caused so many issues it was ridiculous. I ended up deleting numerous “friends” from my Facebook because I did not know who would use my words against me and my family. I decided to repost an edited version to share my thoughts and what I see for my possible future. They are my thoughts and feelings and I will not be scared to share them!
Sometimes we all need a little push to get us going in the direction we are meant to go. I had my little push last Friday (9/23) – too bad it was off a cliff. Last week I lost my job of 10 years under ridiculous circumstances. I really didn’t know how to react, yes I was very sad and upset but there was something else too, maybe it was relief.
So – I find myself unemployed. It is hard to know how to react now, I have seen friends and family go through this. They all seem to get upset, mad, vengeful, depressed. I feel almost guilty to say I am happy. I am happy I am no longer there. I am happy to not be yelled at by customers. (edited removal) I am happy to not to have to make employees mind what they say when they are upset and feel they are justified. (edited removal) I am happy not to be trapped at a desk for 9+ hours a day – too busy to get up and go to lunch. I am happy not to come home at night and on the weekends and start working again. (edit removal) I am happy to not hear the things I was hearing and NOT hearing.
I wake up in the morning and now there is no sense of impending doom. I never knew how negatively it mad me feel. God only knows how it made my endometriosis react. While I still have pain, I am able to go lay down for 20 minutes or so until if feels better. It has not been unbearable this week – and to me that is a miracle!
My life is full of possibilities – I could go and work anywhere I want. I don’t have to go into the same field, I can go do something else! I don’t have to work behind a desk – I could go work where I actually help people and feel like I accomplish something. (edited removal) I could get all my knitting in order and start an Etsy shop. I am free to go find me – and to do what will make me happy and keep me healthy.
(new)My husband has been absolutely wonderful during this – even when the original version of this post was “tattling fodder” and spread like wildfire.
(new) Sadly, people I thought were my friends were not – and I had to remove so many people from my contacts just to make sure. But all of life is a learning lesson, right?
I am happy that I got my push-off a cliff – and happier that I landed on a great big mound of possibilities and happiness! When I turn to look back – that cliff was just a stumble!